Irrational flying fears?

So, in 13 days (insert me squealing loudly and annoyingly here) I will be taking my first international flight, from Australia to Singapore.

I've only been flying for a year, and as obvious from my first sentence, I've never flown out of the country.

And I love flying. Which surprised a lot of people who know me, including me. I'm not the biggest fan of heights; crowds, strange places and new experiences do tend to give me a mild anxiety attack; and there's times when I'm driving and 80 km/hr feels too fast (that's as fast as I can go on my L's).

But I really love it, and although airports stress me out, I've never had any problems actually flying.

Seriously, airports freak me out and are my main cause for anxiety and panic and stress.

Now I'm looking at a reasonably long flight to Singapore, and I'm not worried about the plane crashing or terrorists, or any of those things people who don't fly a lot usually worry about or that you would expect them to worry about.

I worry about things like being late (not an issue for me, because I'm insanely paranoid about being early, but still...); I worry about airlines losing my luggage (not that it's happened, but you hear so many stories); and I worry about dramas whilst checking in (again, it's not happened, but I worry).

Is this normal? Shouldn't I be more worried about technical difficulties and those horror stories that wind up on the news and in future Air Crash Investigation episodes?

I stress over things I can't control. And not things that are out of my control due to machines/technology/etc, but because of other people's actions. I repeat, is this normal??

Child at heart

In case people don't know, I am a teacher. And I love it. Like 95% of the time.

But that's not the point of this blog entry. Yesterday I was on playground duty, and one of the primary school girls was a bit upset.

I asked what was wrong, and she didn't want to tell me (which is fine, but I was still worried). So I asked two of the older girls to go check up on her and see if they could find out what was wrong.

And when they told me, my heart broke a little. The little girl's mum had been at the school and had just left, and she missed her mum.

And even at 21, I 100% get that feeling.

I've just moved out of home for the first time this year, four hours (at elast- depending on route, traffic and weather) from my family and friends. And although when I was home there were times (many times) when my entire family annoyed me to no end and I wished I was 4 hours away, there's times I miss them so much I could (and have) cried.

My dad helped me move out here and stayed for a few days. When he left, I cried. Same when my parents came to visit for the weekend a week or two later. I cried like a baby when they left.

And part of it is their fault. Although I know my parents love me, no one in our family says it a lot. In writing, on birthday cards and such, yes. Not so much verbally.
But since I've moved out, phone conversations and visits finish with an "I love you."
And as I quite like saying/hearing these words, I am moved to tears quite frequently.

But I think there's that part of us when our parents leave us, that we still feel like a 5 year old whos been abandoned. 'Why are you leaving me?'

Or is that just me?

Official Harry Potter Ranking List:

So, this past weekend I had a Harry Potter movie marathon, and it was awesome.

I've always known that Prisoner of Azkaban is my favourite novel in the series, but I've always had a hard time deciding my favourite movie.

I decided this was the perfect opportunity to decide once and for all! Without further ado, here is the list (I've also listed the books in case anyone's interested):

HARRY POTTER BOOKS:

1. Prisoner of Azkaban
2. Goblet of Fire
3. Philosopher's Stone
4. Half-Blood Prince
5. Deathly Hallows
6. Order of the Phoenix
7. Chamber of Secrets

HARRY POTTER MOVIES:

1. Goblet of Fire
2. Prisoner of Azkaban
3. Half-Blood Prince
4. Philosopher's Stone
5. Deathly Hallows (Part 2)
6. Order of the Phoenix (AN. This would be further down the list, but it has lots of Sirius in it, so it gets bonus points)
7. Chamber of Secrets
8. Deathly Hallows (Part 1)

I'm happy to hear anyone else's own favourites if you want to share!

Sitting on top of the world

Get excited guys! Delta Goodrem has new music just around the corner!

It's her first album since 2007, and I know it's going to be as amazing as her first three!

World Poetry Day

So, today is World Poetry Day.

I love poetry, really I do. But I hate studying it. I just love reading it and listening to how the words flow. And I think it's one reason I love music so much too- because what are lyrics, if not poetry?

Anyway, to celebrate I thought I'd share with you my ultimate favourite poem.

Annabel Lee

It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of ANNABEL LEE;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea;
But we loved with a love that was more than love-
I and my Annabel Lee;
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.

The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me-
Yes!- that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we-
Of many far wiser than we-
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.

For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride,
In the sepulchre there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.

-Edgar Allan Poe

Textbook Romance

The other day I discovered that Zoe Foster is in my head.

Confused? Let me explain:

So, one day in 2010 I was randomly reading various people's Wikipedia page (I was at uni with internet and nothing to do- naturally I decide to browse Wikipedia).

And whilst reading the page of one Hamish Blake, it said that he had co-written a book with someone named Zoe Foster. Now, I was unaware of this, I hadn't even heard of Zoe (I was then- and still am- caught in that phase where I was too old for Girlfriend and Dolly, but there was really nothing in Cosmo or Cleo that applied to me either).

The book was a dating guide, and although I have no need for that (in my 21 years, I've been on exactly 1 date and the guy took me to see Jackass 3D for our first date. There was no second date), I decided to buy and read it anyway.

And I'm so glad I did, because I found that Zoe is an awesome and hilarious writer with great advice that if I ever develop a life and by some miracle get asked out again, I might actually use. And Hamish's comments are, as always, hilarious. Less useful than Zoe's, but funny nonetheless.

So, I bought the book, read it, and put it away. But when I moved two months ago, I've been enjoying re-reading all these books I haven't read in a while.

A few weeks ago, after a long (ok, 3 days) search, I bought, read and loved Zoe's latest novel The Younger Man (go buy it, it's awesome). And I noticed as I was reading that some of what Abby was doing (the main character guys, keep up), sounded familiar. And then it clicked- she was using lessons Zoe had put into Textbook Romance!


After my exciting discovery (and a DM from Zoe about that, which thrilled me even more), I decided to re-read Textbook Romance. And then I discovered that Zoe's lessons have apparently seeped into my subconscious (which is a good thing).

Because I'm pretty sure the only people that read this are the people who are reading my Wicked fanfics, I can say this:
Remember in Out of the Blue, when Fiyero realised he was in love with Elphaba, panicked and in an amazing form of logic, broke up with her?
To me, that seemed like something he would do. A "scandalacious" playboy prince realising he's in love for the first time and deals with that by running far, far away (and your reactions to that were kind of funny. Sorry- I have issues with laughing at people's horrified reviews when bad things happen in my stories).

So, you can imagine my shock when I was reading Textbook Romance and came to Chapter 5 "Beware the Self-Startler".
What is a Self-Startler? Well, in Zoe's words it is, "He's the guy who says the Right Things, does the Right Things, is affectionate, persistent and romantic... he bowls in at 400 km/h, only to slam the brakes equally as hard a few weeks- or sometimes even months- later... he realises, that it's actually all going a little too fast for him, and he needs some space (or a hasty departure to Rio)." (Textbook Romance, pg. 119)

Sound familiar, OotB readers? So, if I guy... I don't know... spent a month trying to gain a girl's attention, and then a week convincing her to date him, only to turn around 3 months later and break it off without any real reason? (See Out of the Blue for more details on that).

Or as Hamish described the Self-Startler; "The Self-Startler is terrified of the one thing it looks like he really wants. Like a squirrel with a cashew phobia." (You really want to buy the book now, don't you?)

  And if you're unsure about the advice, think about this: Zoe and Hamish are now engaged!

So seriously, if you're not reading Zoe's books or listening to Hamish and Andy you should be. Like, now.

You never know where you'll find something you can use in a story!

You give me love

I first found this song because my mum loves "Mad About you", and she has this thing about owning the last seasons of TV shows (I don't understand why).
Anyway, so this is how the last ever episode of Mad about you ends, with the use of this Faith Hill so "You give me love".

Yes, I posted this song on here a few weeks ago, when I was struggling to write this fic; but I had to share the song.

It's so catchy and very uplifting.

Writing habits... whether good or bad.

As a writer, you form habits. I guess whether they're good habits or bad habits depends on your interpretation.

For example, I never post anything until it's written. Of the 51 stories I've posted on FF.net since 2008, only one had begun to be posted before I finished it.

I do it this way for several reasons:

1. As much as I'd love to be able to write every day, that doesn't always happen. Sometimes life gets in the way, sometimes I'm tired and/or uninspired to write, and sometimes... well, writer's block can be a bitch. 
2. I am one of those writers who will get an idea whilst writing which requires the adding of a sentence here and there to link it to what I've already written.
3. I suffer from what is known as "word vomit." Because 95% of what I've writing has been pictured and played out in my head before I type anything, when I do start typing, it all spills out from my brain to the page. Which a lot of the time means spelling and grammar mistakes, and sentences that quite frankly, make no sense in hindsight.

One thing I really love to include in my stories are details, and I like to try and make things as realistic as possible.

Which means there have been times when my writer's block is caused because I'm stuck on some small details. And I have trouble moving on until I have all these details worked out.

I also have a habit of never working on just one fic at a time. Even if I am only writing one at a time, there will be at least 3 or more in my "works in progress" folder on my computer, waiting for me to get to them. (I'm really not good when I have nothing to write). 

At the moment, I have 7 stories in my "in progress folder". 5 of those are Wicked related (of the other two, one is Anne of Green Gables and the other one is a Harry Potter one which I have written exactly 1 paragraph of since August 2010 when I started writing my first Wicked fanfiction- oops). 

The thing I'm most excited about seeing Wicked again- in 30 days! (besides actually seeing the show and meeting the cast again at the Stage Door) is that I always get a bunch of ideas after seeing the show. 

The second show (August 2010) inspired Ever Ever After; the third show in Brisbane brought me Falling In and Taking Chances; and the fourth show in August in Perth was the inspiration for Out of the Blue and Stranger to myself (which is still a work in progress).

Who knows what shows 5, 6 and 7 will bring!

I go through stages whether I write better at night or during the day. Sometimes I need music, sometimes I need silence. I guess it depends on my mindset at the time.

I suppose the longer I write the more habits I'll develop. 

Does anyone share these habits? Or have habits of your own you want to share?

Rain

This is the music video for Anthony Callea's song Rain. It's maybe my favourite Anthony Callea song.

Anthony was the original Australian Boq, and he's in a relationship with Tim Campbell, who was the 2nd Australian Fiyero :D 

10 Facts about Disney and I

So, I'm 21 years old (and 9 months) and I still love Disney. Now, I'm proud of that and I know I'm not alone in this, but many people don't understand why (namely my family).

I guess the main reasons I love Disney are that they're based (mostly) on fairy tales; have amazing characters and stories; are hilarious; and the morals and stories never get old. As you get older, you can appreciate them on different levels.

But here are some fun facts about me and Disney:

1. My favourite piece of music of all time (yes, even more than the Wicked soundtrack- I know, it's shocking) is called "The King of Pride Rock" from The Lion King. It's that piece of score from the end of the film when Simba is walking up Pride Rock to accept his place as king.
2. My favourite song from The Little Mermaid is "Part of your world (reprise)". That's right. Not "Part of your world" but the reprise. Do not ask me why.
3. My favourite Disney princess is Belle.
4. When High School Musical first came out (and was being advertised everywhere) I spent days finding someone who had access to the Disney Channel to tape it for us, because I was dying to see it so bad. 
5. I saw High School Musical 3 in cinemas twice.
6. I have seen the Lion King in cinemas 5 times. 4 times when it was first released in 1994, and then again in 2011 when it was re-released in cinemas in 3D. 
7. We have several Disney sing-along videos somewhere at home. Last year, I bought about 4 we didn't have because I wanted the collection (I'm still missing some. And we don't even have a VCR to play videos!) 
8. I remember I was reading a Disney book the night I lost my first tooth (and I still have the book! Sadly, due to my little siblings, the book is not in good condition). 
9. I used to still love watching Saturday Disney on weekends (when they still had good cartoons on- e.g. the Aladdin and Little Mermaid cartoons, House of Mouse and Kim Possible are my favourites).
10. The House fic (where I started writing/publishing official fanfiction) that I'm most proud of is The Ultimate Sacrifice, inspired by Beauty and the Beast.

Disney is in that category (along with Wicked and Harry Potter) where you ignore any slight flaws and plot holes because of it's awesomeness and the mere magic is possesses (although I have a few Disney rants- like my previously blogged Beauty and the Beast issue, and also Pocahontas II). 

So, in case no one can tell, I'm on a Disney kick at the moment. And very tired and very bored. 

A random story that will most likely interest no one.

So, fun story: I remember watching the Little Mermaid on video with the daughters of friends of my dad's when I was probably about 4 or 5.
And I have a vivid memory of seeing the Little Mermaid in cinemas when I was about 7 or 8.
When I thought about this when I was older, this made no sense to me. Because, how could I watch it on video before I saw it in cinemas? Not to mention the fact that the Little Mermaid came out in 1989, a year before I was born.
When I told my parents, my dad had no memory of taking us to the movies to see the Little Mermaid (if you know my dad, that isn't surprising), but I KNEW I was right.
So, when I was in high school, with computer access and bored, I decided to google. And then things made sense!
The Little Mermaid was re-released in cinemas in 1997! So, I HAD seen it first on video and then on cinemas!
Yes, this confirmation was a major relief to me. Things like that drive me mad.

That's weird, right? Yes, these are the things that I think about.

The story behind the music

Sometimes, in between multi-chap fics (which I love, but take up a lot of time and energy), there's nothing better than just churning out a few one-shots based off a few songs.

They're great for several reasons. 

1. You can sometimes find some great music that way- there's songs in my iTunes library I've only bought because I read a story using the song or based off the lyrics.

2. Sometimes the lyrics say things more perfectly than you ever could.

3. Usually the basic premise of the story is already there in the song, so you don't have to think about what to write!

I say usually. Not always. Because some songs are very general, so you can interpret the context of the song in more than one way.

Which is great, because it gives you that little bit of freedom; but sometimes, if you can't think of a context (or have more than 1 possible context), it can be frustrating.

Fics based off songs are more often than not the one time you don't have to worry about writer's block, which as anyone who writes will know, is a pain.

My strategy for writing song-fics is simple:

1. Always search first to see if someone has already written anything based off the same song. If they have, I won't do it. I always check before I write anything, but there is a Gelphie friendship "Wind beneath my wings" one-shot buried somewhere in my recycle bin that will never see the light of day because I found someone else had already done one.

I was actually happy about that because I didn't think mine was very good, and I was stunned that no one else had done so before. 

2. Copy and paste the lyrics into a word document and make notes about the song's context, and how this will fit into whatever fandom you're writing in. 

3. Watch the music video of the song and listen to it repeatedly for however long suits you (Kiss the Girl- just written, not published yet- was played for about three hours repeatedly whilst writing it. Get it Right was played for two days). 

4. Um, write it. I like to slip lyrics of the song into the story, just because it's fun that way. 

Write now, I'm trying to write a one-shot based off this Faith Hill song "You Give me love". It's a beautiful uplifting song, but I'm having trouble deciding on a context.

My initial idea was either a proposal or a wedding type thing; but the first few lines made me reconsider.

"You turn around, then you ask me behind tears of doubt, just what do I see in you?"

So, then I was thinking of what situations would bring that question to be asked? Last night, I had the thought maybe it was a "meeting the parents" situation gone wrong type thing, but I'm just not sure....

So, I'm going off to play the song again and hopefully inspiration will strike! 

You turn around

Then you ask me behind tears of doubt

Just what do I see in you

Please don't cry

I know sometimes it seems

we barely get by

But you don't see how much you do

To get me through

When the world is cold

And I need a friend to hold

You give me love... you give me love

And when my hope is gone

And I feel I can't go on

You pick me up

You give me love... you give me love

I apologize

If I never told you what you are in my eyes

Oh baby, let me tell you now

Every day

Looks sweeter knowing you'll be there in every way

Now how can you say that's not enough

'Cause when the world is cold

And I need a friend to hold

You give me love... you give me love

And when my hope is gone

And I feel I can't go on

You pick me up

You give me love, you give me

Everything my heart desires

Morning sun and midnight fires

Someone there to share my dreams

With you I have everything

When the world is cold

And I need a friend to hold

You give me love... you give me love

And when my hope is gone

And I feel I can't go on

You pick me up

You give me love

Yeah, when the world is cold

And I need a friend to hold

You give me love... you give me love

And when my hope is gone

And I feel I can't go on

You pick me up

You give me love

(By the way, there is no official music video for this song. But I liked this one... because it's Disney :D)