Wicked in Wagga

Alright, here we go.

The rundown on my 31st show of Wicked, my third community theatre production.

This time, I wrote my notes out during the show in the dark (as opposed to trying to reciting notes to myself throughout and then scribbling frantically through intermission), so we'll see how much they make sense now!

No One Mourns the Wicked: 

Our Glinda was a good vocalist. At times a little over the top in her acting- which you can do with Glinda, but it didn't always work in this case.

Also, the Monkeys. They entered through the audience to come up on stage, which is fine. I've had that happen before and I don't mind it. But they entered at the top of the overture, I found that a little distracting. The overture is such a moment, let us have a bit of it to set the mood before the Monkeys come in!

The staging of the birth of Elphaba was staged with the bed being brought out while the Wizard came out, facing away from the audience. The Wizard and Melena hopped on the bed during their little dance, and then the Wizard ran off and Melena went into labour.

Maybe the director couldn't find a fake belly and way to hide it? I don't know.

Dear Old Shiz:

When looking at the cast list, it didn't appear as though the ensemble was much smaller than a usual cast, but either it was- or DOS was just staged badly.

Instead of having ensemble members run off while Glinda was talking, to be replaced by Shiz students later, they would walk off in twos and threes with dismissive gestures- as though they were turning away from Glinda and just walking off.

But that meant by the time Glinda got to "and we were both very young" there were only two ensemble members on stage, and then all the Shiz students appeared.

Also, Glinda was waving her wand, as though to conjure all the different parts of Shiz and such- including Elphaba's arrival.

While the students were running away from Elphaba, one girl held her nose, as though Elphaba stunk, which I thought was a bit much.

G(a)linda and her friends were laughing and talking during Morrible's welcome speech, with a particularly loud burst after "nothing but the highest hopes", so it looked as though Morrible added the "for some of you" in response to that. As a teacher (though hopefully a better teacher than Morrible!) I found that appropriate.

When Elphaba first introduced herself, she pronounced it as "Alphaba", with a heavy emphasis on the "A" and I was worried, but that was the only time.

The Wizard and I:

Our Elphaba had a good voice, and she could hit the notes but didn't quite have the belt to sustain the big ones.

Her acting, however, didn't quite do it for me. It kinda felt like the actress didn't really know what to do with her hands throughout the show, and so just kept gesturing. And while there are moments in the show where that works. But there were a lot of moments where it didn't.

What is This Feeling?:

Nothing really to comment on here, except for the last chorus, they were all doing the same choreography- including Elphaba. Not a huge deal, except the point (for me) of WISF, is to establish Elphaba as an outsider. Having her dance along with Glinda and the ensemble ruined that for me.

Something Bad:

Our Dillamond was fine but didn't really sell the "G-G-Glinda" for me. Likewise, Elphaba's speech about maybe "some of us are different" had no fire.
She was very stiff and cold throughout, which meant Galinda's retort of "Well, I see the artichoke is steamed" fell flat (although people still laughed).

Morrible also entered the classroom earlier than usual, and just stood there watching Dillamond and Elphaba talk for a bit.

Dillamond neither hid the chalkboard nor made an effort to do so.

Dancing Through Life:

Fiyero's entrance was fine.

In fact, our Fiyero was great and (in my opinion) the strongest cast member. Which is no surprise, given our Fiyero actually was in the ensemble and understudied Fiyero in the 2010-2011 Aussie production.

That being said, Fiyero and Glinda's meeting was a little awkward. It felt like Glinda missed a cue, or forgot a line for a second or something.

My notes just say "Fiyero👍✅✅✅✔" (actually, it just had a tick. But I just found out you can use emojis here, and got excited)

Boq on the other hand... Act 2, I liked him (we'll get to that). Act 1, I found him a bit... almost creepy? I don't know what it was. Maybe it was that he was by far the tallest Boq I've ever seen (he towered over Glinda).

And there was a bit during DTL where he went to sit at the base of the statue, folded his arms and sulked.

I don't know. It just really rubbed me the wrong way, and I didn't like him.

When Morrible entered the OzDust to talk to Galinda, she called her Elphaba at first.

When Elphaba entered, and Nessa wheeled herself out of the room, Elphaba went after her but stopped just short of exiting the stage.

Popular:

There was a moment in Popular (I didn't note when exactly, and I'm trying to think of it right now and blanking...) but Galinda was laughing and she snorted. Not sure if that was an acting choice or an accident, but she played it really well.

Elphaba's toss, toss attempts were in silence? At first, I wondered if it was a sound issue, but it wasn't.

Galinda called Elphaba's dress "your simple, ugly frock".

She did a "testing 1,2,3" with the wand that was funny.

Oddly, my friend didn't like this song? She thought it was so shallow, and I'm like "That's the point! If you think about the lyrics, it's not shallow!"

I'm Not That Girl:

OMO, I was looking at my notes and it looked like it said "INTG- glaves" and I was like "wtf? What's a glave? Did I mean glove? Why would I write glove?"

I then realised it's "INTG- glasses" (again, I wrote these in the dark, often while not actually looking at the paper to try and focus on the show).

Anyway, why did I write glasses?

Because Elphaba, once she took the flower from her hair, put her glasses back on! First time I've ever seen that. I mean, she took them off again before her magic went haywire, but I still liked that she put them back on for a moment.

When Elphaba gave her "can you imagine a world?" speech, she and Fiyero were standing right next to the Cub's cage surrounded by students and the teacher, and I don't buy no one wouldn't overhear them talking. She did move during "someone has to do something" line, but it was odd staging.

But the Lion Cub scene. I loved that scene. Elphaba grabbing Fiyero's hand looked so natural (because sometimes it can look awkward) and when she let go, Fiyero shook his hand a little and put his hand on his heart!

It reminded me of the hand flex/twitch scene in the 2005 Pride and Prejudice movie, and I just loved it.

When Fiyero took the cub, he didn't do the "oops, it's the other way" thing. Which doesn't really matter, but I always enjoy it.

INTG was sung really well. I think it was really in our Elphaba's range and it was done beautifully.

Glinda came on stage earlier- while Elphaba was first singing "blithe smile, lithe limb," etc.

One Short Day:

When Elphaba and Glinda ran off to do their change for OSD, Elphaba didn't take her suitcase. So Glinda grabbed it. Not sure if she forgot it, or if it was planned, but I was like "random".

Which was not the most random thing in this scene.

There were all sorts of random things in this scene- ensemble members were zipping around the stage on roller skates, bikes (not so random), scooters, Segways and a shopping trolley?!

My friend who I went with said (because the director was her HS drama teacher so she knows him) that he likes to put "quirky" things into his shows (for whatever reason). But I found it really distracting and odd- mainly the shopping trolley.

This is also the first community theatre production I've seen of the show that included the flat tops in the Wizomania part (or tried to). They were dressed in these... well:

Except that they were white, not green.

A Sentimental Man:

Chistery was a girl!

And Elphaba hesitated after grabbing the Grimmerie before running off stage.

When the guards came on stage, they all had the "Oz" symbol on their clothes- except for one, who only had an "L". Another one of those "quirky" director choices.

But again, I found it distracting. Was he supposed to be a 'learner' guard? What did the L stand for?? I still don't know.

Defying Gravity:

Elphaba hit the notes but lacked power a bit for the big belts. But she still flew, I still teared up.

When I asked my friend what she thought of the show at intermission, she said "I'm so immersed!" and she thought DG was great. Which means I can still be friends with her 😂 LOL.

Thank Goodness: 

There was a Monkey on stage in the beginning to raise the curtain, which didn't make as much sense as it does in the overture.

After Fiyero ran off, Glinda didn't go back up onto the podium until her "bridges you didn't know you crossed until you crossed" line, so she sang that middle bit of the song upstage, while the ensemble and Morrible were frozen around the podium.

Wicked Witch of the East:

I really liked Nessa's dress in this scene. I didn't really have any strong feelings on our Nessa.

They lowered the curtain for this scene as a backdrop, so it looked as though Nessa had a giant map of Oz on one wall of her study.

Elphaba's Act 2 dress was pretty if a bit too sparkly.

Boq was really good in this scene, especially in the "my heart is shrinking!" bit, and that redeemed him from Act 1 slightly. Far less creepy.

My friend leaned over here when Boq came back as the Tin Man and was like "Ohhh, I get it!" which made me laugh.

Wonderful:

Our Wizard had a decent voice, but I've always scene Wonderful as the Wizard putting on a show, you know? Trying to lull Elphaba back on his side, and our Wizard didn't make it much of a show.

Fiyero had a sword, instead of a gun. I'm not sure if they couldn't find a prop gun, or it was just another director choice. Either way, wasn't a huge distraction.

When Fiyero said "I'm going with her" Elphaba's response was "Whaat?" (I don't think that describes it very well. This is the closest equivalent I could find on youtube, but it's not exactly right). And it was funny but didn't really work at the moment.

I'm Not That Girl (reprise):

Elphaba and Fiyero came on stage at the beginning of the song, instead of near the end, so they were just milling around as Glinda sung.

As Long As You're Mine:

There was no kiss between Elphaba's solo and Fiyero's, but it was a really beautiful performance. Their voices blended well together, and it was right in our Elphaba's range again.

My friend didn't like this song either. She thought it was cheesy and in the wrong place.

After Nessa's death, the background was just a house silhouette and some corn stalks, so there wasn't much there.

During the catfight, there was kung-fu music (?!) as Elphaba and Glinda prepared to fight. I did not like it.

And when the guards came on, they just stood there for a bit watching and smiling to one another like "yeah, girl fight!" Ugh.

Fiyero's rope swing was great. Got a lot of laughter and applause, and then he was strutting around the stage for a bit until they stopped, which while funny didn't really work in the moment.

No Good Deed:

While Elphaba was chanting the spell, her voice echoed a bit, which was awesome.

March of the Witch Hunters:

The witch hunters marched off stage while singing at the end.

For Good: 

Was fine, except Glinda and Elphaba both sung to the audience more than each other.

After Dorothy "melted" Elphaba, her silhouette shrugged as if to say "oops". Didn't love that either.

After, my friend was like "I don't understand! How did she survive? In the Wizard of Oz, she clearly melted!" so I had to explain that.

We also had a talk on the way home about politics and stuff, because she was like "where does it fit timewise in history?" and I just laughed and said "depends on whether you want to go by Wizard of Oz book or movie, or the Wicked book or when the musical was made" because she was getting communism vibes for a lot of the show.

My friend also said "I can see why you like it so much. It's got so many layers and deeper meaning", and she said that she really enjoyed it! So, that's another win for me!

Overall, it wasn't as good as the Canberra production I saw, but better than the Wollongong one. I was honestly just relieved that I liked our Fiyero, because (even though I saw the Wollongong production in August and I saw it on Broadway last month) the Wollongong one left me a little unnerved. I didn't like not liking Fiyero!

I think that's everything I can think of about the show... costumes and sets I was mostly happy with. I didn't like the "quirk" the director added though.

My first Broadway Trip!

I've been back from the US for 3 days now, and whilst I'm still pretty jet lagged (I did not appreciate the 4.30 am wake up call this morning), my brain is slowly growing less foggy.

I was asked to write a blog post about my thoughts on Broadway and the shows I saw there, and thought this was as good as time as any- in the time where I can now form coherent sentences, and the shows are still pretty fresh in my mind. 

We saw five shows on Broadway- The Phantom of the Opera, Dear Evan Hansen, Anastasia, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Wicked. 

I'm going to do a quick run down on my thoughts of each, and some general thoughts on the US Broadway experience. So, here goes:

General: 

First things first- this isn't my photo of Times Square above. 

Only because I'm writing this at work on my lunch break (I tend to hit a wall at about 1-2 pm, and getting anything productive done after that is a struggle), and all my photos are on my camera at home. 

Anyway, my first thought on seeing Times Square was WOW. And honestly, that didn't go away the entire week we were there (except maybe Saturday night when it was even more insane than usual with people around, but that was brief). 

Having all the theatre at our fingertips all the time was a dream come true. It is the sole reason I'm still thinking "man, I want to live in New York" (the rest of me, is like... 'nah, I'm good')

Theatres:

The theatres in NY are gorgeous, and historic. But there are some odd layouts. It's a little disarming to walk pretty much right off the street into the theatre. 

We loved how intimate all the theatres are- not all the theatres in Australia are this intimate. But we also found that the audio levels seemed lower than usual... it wasn't noticeable in all the shows, but especially in one or two shows, particularly the vocals seemed quieter than the orchestra. 

Here, the audio is part of the immersive experience and seems to surround you. We were expecting the same thing here, and didn't get it. 

Stage Door:

We only attempted stage door once on Broadway- for Anastasia. For Phantom, we didn't know of anyone; Evan Hansen, we knew we wouldn't get close enough to so much as see Ben Platt so didn't bother; and after Anastasia, we didn't want to repeat the experience for Charlie or Wicked.

We knew stage door would be busier than back in Australia, but it was just too much. Everyone was pushing, and in everyone's faces, and I just couldn't deal with it. I was getting crabby with the pushing, and SD is not supposed to be a crabby experience. 

We did get to see most of the cast, but I was feeling overwhelmed, tired and a little sick, so we left before the end. 

One more thing....

Is it a general Broadway thing, or did we just get really unlucky to have people talking near us at every single show??? (Actually, I think except DEA. And I don't remember Phantom. But definitely Wicked, Charlie, and Anastasia)

We had people right behind us, who felt it was completely ok to whisper to one another throughout the entire show. 

I'm a pretty polite person. But honestly, shut up. Do Not Talk During Shows. Conversation is for intermission. I came a long way, and waited a long time to get to Broadway and see these shows- every time I have to turn around to glare at you takes me out of the show and annoys me a little bit more.

This has been a PSA

OK, on to the shows.

Shows:

The Phantom of the Opera:

To be honest, this is the show I remember the least clearly beyond how amazingly tired I was. I hadn't quite adjusted to the time difference yet, and we'd pretty much been going to bed around 8-9 pm, and Phantom didn't start until 8. 

I'd seen the live DVD version with Sierra Boggess multiple times, and I've seen the Gerald Butler movie (which I did not hate as much as everyone else appears to), but we were really looking forward to seeing it live- the last time it was in Australia was like 2008(?) so I missed it. 

And it was good, I really enjoyed it. I found the chandelier falling a little anti climatic in reality, which was disappointing, but I loved the sets and staging. Our Meg also wasn't as strong as I'd seen/heard elsewhere. 

I just really wish I'd been more awake (side note- why do theatres in the US only sell alcohol and water??? The only theatre we were at with other beverages available was the Gershwin. I really needed a sugar hit, guys). 

Dear Evan Hansen:

Phew. Where to start? First of all, wearing makeup was a mistake.

DEA was... everything I wanted it to be. I've been listening to the music on repeat for months, I've seen half a bootleg and read the script (I am not good at waiting for things or surprises), but it was still more than I expected. 

Ben Platt was amazing. Let's just establish that, say "well, duh" and move on. 

We had the understudy for Connor, who was great and the rest of the cast was excellent. 

I cried so much in this show. I need it to come to Australia, like ASAP. 

One thing though was the character of Alana. When I read the script, I knew I'd have issues with part of her story. But it's one thing to read it and another to see it. 

I won't elaborate on this, for those who haven't seen it and don't appreciate spoilers like I do. But if you do want to know more, tweet at me. 

But as I told Kelly back in February, when I rang her at like 8 am and demanded we go see this on our trip, this show is so important (even if my mother only believes me now that Reese Witherspoon saw the show and said the same thing. Don't ask). I'm so glad I got to see it. 

Anastasia:

I adore the 1997 movie, let's just get that straight. I own the soundtrack, I've watched it a million times, I love it. 

This is the movie that got me interested in Russian history. 

I know there's always complaints about it not being historically accurate, but I've always approached historical movies like you do Wikipedia. Use it as a jumping off point to get a basic overview of the topic and to find accurate sources and educate yourself about the topic. 

Because of the movie, I studied Russian history in high school and have always read it about it. 

That being said, the musical had everything you love about the movie, some great new songs, and does a much better job of working an accurate depiction of Russian history into the show. 

It's visually stunning- the costumes are gorgeous, and the sets are wonderful. The one slow bit for me was the Lily/Vlad subplot. Like, I always skip those songs on the soundtrack. It's a bit of filler, and it's amusing but Caroline O'Conner (who plays Lily) is Australian. I've seen her in 2 other shows back in Oz, and she's played pretty much the same kind of character. 

But I got to have a quick chat with her about Australia at SD, which was the best part of SD. 

Now, the producers have already said they plan to bring the show to Australia eventually, and I will absolutely go see it again when it does- multiple times.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory:

This show was a last minute addition to our list. 

We did a walking tour of Broadway over the weekend, and our guide did a good job of talking the show up, I guess! We were also impressed by how the outside of the theatre was done up to immerse you in Wonka land from the moment you approach, so we wanted to see how that carried across to the rest of the theatre.

To our disappointment, it mostly doesn't. But they had some cool merch and a giant golden ticket to take photos with. 

The musical uses some music from the Gene Wilder movie from 1971 ("Candyman", "Pure Imagination", etc). But most of the songs they created for the musical aren't that memorable. I can only think of two of the top of my head, and only one I really liked. 

The Oompa- Loompas were amusing, we'd wondered how they'd be done. It was pretty much like Lord Farquaad in Shrek the musical, if that helps anyone. 

It was a fun show, and the sets and special effects were great, and Christian Borle is an excellent Wonka. But the music wasn't great. 

I definitely liked it better than the last Dahl adapted musical I saw (Matilda- for reasons I won't get into here), but it wasn't my favourite. If it came to Australia, I might go see it again- but would probably depend on the cast. 

Wicked:

Oh, my love <3 

This was my 30th time seeing Wicked. 

And my first time since August 2010 (my second show) getting to see the full production as intended- with a trapdoor in NOMTW and NGD, for example.  Every time after that was the tour production, so no trap door. 

I did not realise how much I miss the trap door.

Jackie Burns was an amazing Elphaba, and we actually had the understudy Glinda (yep, not standby. Understudy) who was excellent, but also perhaps one of the calmest Glinda's I've seen. Fun Fact: This is also the first time I've seen a Glinda who wasn't the lead. 

I came very close to having a breakdown after the show while we were leaving the theatre. I did not want to leave. I honestly debated just living in the Gershwin, like a Phantom of the Opera deal, but far less creepy. It would work, right?

I'm seeing my third community theatre production of Wicked next month, so there is that to look forward to, but it's really hard leaving Wicked behind. And the Gershwin, although not as old or fancy, is probably my favourite of the ones we attended. 

That or the Lunt-Fontanne Theatre where Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was. Just in terms of layout.

In terms of interior decor and design, probably my fave was the Broadhurst where Anastasia was. We both felt it was the perfect theatre for the show. 

To sum up:

I loved my first trip to Broadway so much and it was a dream come true, but I never thought "theatre isn't like this at home" or "this is so much better"

I had a lot of people say to me "you won't be able to watch theatre here [in Australia] after Broadway" and that is definitely not true.

My sister (who did NY a few years ago and saw Aladdin on Broadway) said "oh, it's better on Broadway" (despite not seeing the Australian production), and I can't see that being true. 

The atmosphere of Broadway is amazing, yes. But the quality is just as good as here in Australia, which makes me even more proud of our theatre industry here. 

I think the only time we had a moment where we honestly didn't know who could do the role as well as we saw in the US, was Ben Platt as Evan Hansen. We couldn't think of an Australian equivalent, but it is a younger role, and by the time the show comes here, who knows who'll be around for the role?

Will I go back to Broadway if I ever get the chance? Hell yes.

After Forever

If you're reading this, there's a good chance you've just read the first chapter of my new Fiyeraba fic, After Forever.

In which case, let me start off by saying: I am so sorry!

I did not want to write this story. Ok, that's a lie. I kinda did.

But when I first had the idea, my first thought was "I have to write this." My second was "People are going to kill me."

That was in August 2014. Life, work and other stories meant it took me a while to actually get around to writing this.

I don't remember when I actually started writing it, but I know March 2016 I was on Chapter 3, so I'm guessing it was early that year.

I can admit, I procrastinated. This was a hard story to write. Namely because, until I got to about chapter 21 (there are 31 total, just FYI), I genuinely did not know if Elphaba and Fiyero would get back together or not by the end.

And I'm not telling you now if they do or not. You'll just have to keep reading.

It was an emotional fic to write. I cried, a lot.

But I really felt the need to write this story.

So, a few notes:

• I have never had marriage/relationship counselling. Obviously, because I'm not married or in a relationship. Although I have seen a psychologist regularly on my own, for about a year and a half. 
• Again, there's 31 chapters total. 
• I am currently on holiday in the US for 2 weeks, so please bear with me if I don't update as frequently. 

Also, this is the first fic I've written that has it's own Spotify playlist! Every chapter title is a song. Sometimes it fit really well, sometimes there was just a poignant lyric that I felt fit the chapter, sometimes the song just gave me the right vibe I wanted. 

I'll post the link to each song on my Twitter account (@carlie_dawn) when I upload the chapter. Of course, the title and artist are written at the bottom of every chapter, and I encourage you to have a listen.

If there is a song that you feel works for the chapter, please let me know in your review, and I'll check it out. I may even add it to the playlist! 

When the story is complete, I'll share the complete playlist (your suggestions included). 

Happy reading(?)

PS. Side note regarding research- It was actually really hard to find articles on separation that weren't "you should save your marriage because God says divorce is bad."
Like, can you imagine saying that to Elphaba? Her face... man, the mental image makes me laugh. 

Notes on a Community Theatre Production of Wicked.

Last night I went and saw a community production of Wicked, in my hometown.

As when I saw the production in Canberra last year, I thought I'd put together a list of observations about the production.

Overall, it wasn't as high quality a production the one I saw last year, but had less technical issues, which is impressive because it was only their third performance.

Me with Lauren

I went with my friend Lauren, and I was pretty excited- and far less anxious than I'd been before seeing the Canberra production. This was my 29th time seeing Wicked, which is kinda surreal.

This was the map of Oz that made up the curtain, which appeared to be an image projected onto a screen.

It's an accurate map, but it did remind Lauren and I of a map of Oz that a kid at school might fill in- not in a bad way.

The theatre is also tiny. I think it seats probably only 200 max? Or less. I'm so bad at guessing these things.

But our seats were good, we could see and hear everything.

I made my notes by scene, so I'm just going to list a few things that stood out for various reasons. But before that, a general overview of our cast:



Our Elphaba was decent vocally- she hit most of the big notes, but often didn't have enough power to make them last, so she'd run up and down them and sometimes fall flat. She could act, which is helpful, but her characterisation wasn't quite right, but I can't quite put my finger on how.

I wondered if I was just being picky, because I am admittedly biased (Jemma Rix reasons), but Lauren felt this way too.

Our Glinda was excellent. Seriously. She nailed all her notes, especially the high ones, and had excellent Glinda mannerisms. I think if a professional production of Wicked came back in 5-10 years, with a little more training, she could be Glinda for reals and I'd be thrilled.

Fiyero was... problematic. He could sing- his voice was actually very nice. But... well, I'll get to this.


Nessarose was another standout for us. Fantastic voice. I didn't have any strong feelings either way about her in Act 1, and then Act 2 she kinda blew us away.

Boq was a pretty solid Boq. I saw his picture in the program and went 'yeah, I see it'. He had a good voice too, and I was happy with his performance for the most part. There was only one little thing I had an issue with, and that may have been a direction choice I think.

The Wizard, Morrible and Dr Dillamond were all fine. No strong thoughts.

Sets were fine, costumes were fine... no complaints here.

Ok, here's my notes on the scenes:



No One Mourns the Wicked: 

• Glinda's bubble was like a chair atop a black platform (that could be raised or lowered) with a giant bubble thing behind it, which got pushed onto the stage by crew members.
• The doll they used for baby Elphaba was tiny, as you can see in the photo on the right. 

Dear Old Shiz: 

• I liked the staging they did for this scene. 
• The "kids" were in groups of like 3-4 around the stage, and throughout the song Elphaba would go stand with a group, they'd lean away in disgust, she'd get a bit more dejected and move to a different group. Then she ended the song standing alone on centre stage. 
• Also, Elphaba had 2 suitcases, instead of one (This is important later)
• The slippers Frex gave Nessa were actually red. Not silver. 
• After Galinda delivered her "Magic Wands: Need They Have a Point?" line, the other students applauded her. 
• When Elphaba's magic when haywire, Galinda grabbed Boq's arm (because he was standing right next to her). 

The Wizard and I: 

• When Morrible declared she'd take no other students, Galinda burst into tears and started sobbing onto Boq's shoulder for a few minutes, while he stared dazedly off into the distance. 
• When Elphaba got to the whole "And I'll stand there with the Wizard" part... there just wasn't a lot of emotion there. She didn't sound very happy. 
• Throughout the song, Elphaba had been doing stuff with one suitcase, while the other remained on the floor. When she went to leave the stage after the song, she only took the one suitcase with her. And then she turned, and beckoned to the other suitcase, (which I guess was remote controlled) and it followed her off stage (actually it went the wrong direction at first which was kinda funny). And the idea was cool, but it does imply Elphaba has control over her powers, which is not supposed to be the case. It was a little too Sabrina the Teenage Witch for me. 

What is this Feeling?:

• Nothing to note. 

Something Bad:

• The only really thing to note here is that the blackboard in the classroom was weird. 
• I recreated it on Microsoft Paint with what I remembered. (I can't draw, even on Paint. The thing under the arrow is supposed to be the infinity symbol)
• I feel like there may have been some more odd equations, but I don't really remember. 

Dancing Through Life: 

• Ok. Here we go. Um, how do I put this? (Man this hurts to write):
• Fiyero was a jerk. He was a smarmy, kinda creepy, over dramatic jerk. Allow me to elaborate. 
• So, instead of a rickshaw, Fiyero was sleeping on like a wooden luggage dolly. (Picture isn't exact, but it's the closest I could find). 
• And their version almost knocking over Elphaba is: she was standing stage left, reading. Avaric entered stage right, pushing the cart, and walked across the stage until he bumped into Elphaba. 
• Here's the other thing to note about Avaric. He was old. He was an old man, dressed in... something like this. 

It was pretty much like this.

• So, Elphaba woke Fiyero up, he did his "it's day time" line, and then Avaric pretty much tipped him off the cart/dolly thing. 
• Then Fiyero got up, walked around to Avaric and was so mean to him. He was like "Well. I'll see you soon, Avaric. I don't suppose I'll last longer... etc etc (you guys know the line)"
• And then Avaric did that mimic, mocking thing under his breath. And then walked off stage saying "work, work, work, that's all I do. Tow the cart, Lift the (something I don't remember)". 
• Then when Fiyero had his line "Maybe the driver saw green..." he like got super into Elphaba's face and ran a finger down her cheek. 
• And then she slapped him around the face and walked off stage. 
• Fiyero wasn't pertubed by this in the least, and immediately went to hit on two girls in the background while Galinda and Boq did their bit. 
• As soon as Galinda turned up, Fiyero was all over her. And again, it came off super smarmy and creepy. 
• When he did the "what do you do for fun around here?" line, he took Galinda into his arms and like dipped her a bit, and went to kiss her; and then when Boq chimed in with "we've been studying" he stuck his head in between them, so they ended up each kissing one of his cheeks. 

Popular:

• Nothing really to note on the performance here. 
• They had a bright green light on Elphaba's side of the room, and pink on Galinda's side. 
• The shelves behind Galinda's bed had a bunch of shoes on it, per usual, but Elphaba's was weirdly empty.
• The beds had been pushed onto the stage by crew members (we could hear the movement before the lights came up). After Galinda had her "it's your very first party" line, right before Elphaba said "do funerals count?", a crew member popped up from behind Elphaba's bed and walked off stage, which was funny. 

I'm Not That Girl:

• In the beginning of the scene, when Elphaba was practicing her hair toss, all the other kids in class were watching, pointing and laughing. 
• Dr Niddick was a woman, which is new. 
• The Lion Cub was not a cub. It had a mane. But whatever. 
• Right before Dr Niddick went to inject the Cub, she did an evil laugh. 
• Another weird Fiyero thing- when he ran off to "get the Cub to safety", he ran off without the Lion Cub. And I thought "oh that's ok, he'll come back to get it. That's the joke." But he didn't. 
• So, Elphaba sang a lot of INTG to the Cub, and then in the instrumental break, took it offstage and let it go. While she was doing that, Fiyero and Galinda came onto the platform on stage left and made out for a bit. And then Fiyero just smiled at Galinda and they left the stage. No hesitating, no looking around for Elphaba, nothing. 

Train Station Scene/ One Short Day: 

• Fiyero didn't bing flowers to Elphaba. 
• And another weird Fiyero thing. When Galinda changed her name to Glinda, he did almost a little bow with his "that's very admirable, Glinda" line, and then started to walk off. And then he did a sharp turn around to Elphaba to wish her good luck. It was a really looked oddly sharp and over dramatic- not quite to the extreme of Draco or Lucius Malfoy in A Very Potter Musical/Sequel, but that kinda thing. It was so bizarre. 
• Emerald City costumes were good for the ensemble, although there were quite a few wearing green wigs. 
• Also, the ensemble member who gave the girls glasses did some very snazzy kicks. 

Defying Gravity: 

• Elphaba's hat fell off when she grabbed the broom. 
• She stood on the same platform that had been Glinda's "bubble" and they raised it so she flew. 

Thank Goodness:

• Good performance, but for some reason Boq was there????
• He was standing there watching as Glinda and Fiyero had their little conversation. It was odd, considering his "we can't leave Munchkinland" line. 

Wicked Witch of the East:

• Act 2 dress was pretty accurate. I liked it. 
• This production loved the dry ice. Every time Elphaba did a spell, she got a faceful of dry ice. 
• When Nessa was threatening Boq with her "did you think I'd let you leave me here flat?" line, she grabbed him by the shirt front and was right in her face. It worked. 

Wonderful:

• For some reason, after Elphaba releases the Monkeys, Chistery stayed? He climbed back atop the Wizard's head thing for the rest of the scene. I assume it was to help push it off stage once the lights went down, but in terms of the story, it made no sense.
• When Elphaba said her "Fiyero, you frightened me" line, she touched his face? And like... she has no reason to know his feelings at that stage, I don't know why she would do that. 
• Yet another odd Fiyero moment. He was right up in Glinda's face when he said "I'm going with her" and then he immediately did a sharp turn and walked over to Elphaba and then both girls were like "What?" 
• But there was a nice Fiyero moment- when he said "well, it was. But it wasn't." he took Elphaba's hand, which was sweet. 
• The Wizard said to Morrible "How about a change in the weather?" instead of Morrible. 

I'm Not That Girl (Reprise)/As Long As You're Mine:

• Glinda had a moment where she was standing on the platform on stage right, and she took off her engagement ring and put it on the railing before walking off. Nice moment and symbolism, unless you think about the fact that she bought herself the engagement ring. 
• SO. MUCH. DRY. ICE. At times, you could barely see Elphaba and Fiyero. 
• ALAYM wasn't as risque as the Canberra production, but they did spend a lot of time lying down. Like, Fiyero was lying on the ground with Elphaba kinda leaning over him as she sang, etc. 
• Fiyero's shirt was... yeah. It was like the shirt Mr Darcy wears at the end of the 2005 Pride and Prejudice movie, except I swear the neck line was lower. You could see like half his chest. 

Our Fiyero couldn't really pull this look off.

Just for this moment...?

• It was just a little odd. I swear, for most of the song, they could have been posing for the cover of one of those Harlequin romance books. You know the ones I'm talking about.
• It was one of the least enjoyable ALAYM scenes I've ever watched. (I'd say the least, but I am torn between this and one Fiyero I saw who kinda butchered the vocals). 
• At the end after Elphaba ran off to Nessa, they had an actual model of a house that kind of spun across the stage, which was cool. 

No Good Deed:

• They had Nessa's legs in the background. I was like "... oh."
• There was a cross in the background for them to hang Fiyero on. 
• As the lights went down, you could see the guards start to beat Fiyero- punching his gut, etc. 
• Elphaba's first "Fiyerooo" you could barely hear, but I think that was a mic issue. Her second "Fiyero" riff was awesome, but her riff on "again" fell flat. 

March of the Witch Hunters:

• Nothing to note here.

For Good/Finale:

• For Good was very sweet. My only note was "<3" 
• There was a voiceover the melting, with a voice saying "I'm melting!" which was... meh. But whatever. 
• I got teary at curtain call. May have been just a combo of the fact it'd been ten months since I'd seen it, and the realisation the next time I see the show (about 51 days from now) it'll be on Broadway.  Oz, I miss this show. 

That's about it. So, I wasn't rapt with Fiyero, and Glinda and Nessa were the standouts. 

2017 Goals Continued: The Voices in My Head

I keep coming back to the question "What do I want 2017 to be?"

There's a lot of things I'm looking forward to this year.

Finally going to America, a trip that's been a dream for 10 years and a matter of timing for 5, is definitely the highlight. Getting to meet one of my dearest friends for the first time in person as a part of that trip is another.

I'm dying to finally see the new live action Beauty and the Beast movie (70 days and counting!) and the Lifetime remake of Beaches (because Idina). I'm excited for Lea Michele's second album and Delta Goodrem to release the tour DVD of the Wings of the Wild tour that was the highlight of my 2016.

I'm looking forward to going back to work and doing my job, knowing I don't have to worry about "Will I have work for next year?" a question that was always on my mind when I was on contract, even in January.

I've already mentioned that I want to make writing a goal for this year, and that kind of led to another thought today.

Yesterday I posted my first oneshot for the year, and the first thing I've posted since October 2016. It has 1 review.

And this isn't going me complaining about the number of reviews. I've noticed in the last year or 2 that people do seem to be reviewing less- hell, reading less. I know I am definitely reading less fanfiction, just because there seems to be less that grabs me and demands that I read it. More often that not, I'm just re-reading old favourites than anything new.

But the thing about FF.net is that unless people review, you have no idea who (if anyone) has read it. Yes, there's favourites and follows, but I don't look at those numbers. If you really want to, you can look at the hits your story has, but I don't really understand those numbers and its far too easy for me to work myself into a panic about why a story with 300 hits only has 8 reviews or something.

So, people are reading and reviewing less, myself included. And every time I write, I remind myself that I write for myself and not for other people, and the older I get, the less anxious I get about that review number. It genuinely doesn't matter to me in the way it did when I was 18 and first posting.

But when there's nothing, it's too easy for me to think "Is anybody reading this? Why do I bother posting them?" and all these insecurities I think I've risen above come back to haunt me.

And my God, I hate that. I hate that I let it get to me, and these thoughts pop up, because like I said, I genuinely write for myself, not for other people. Sharing these stories on the internet is just a bonus, I could quite happily keep writing and never show anyone.

I'm going to be 27 this year. I am so tired of letting things like this get to me.

When I message friends and hear nothing back, plans are discussed but nothing ever comes of it, I do the same thing. Start to think "do people really like me?"

This question has haunted me since I was 15, born of way too many times of being burned. But I know on a rational level, that I do have genuine friends who do like me. And you know, people have lives.

It's too easy for me to believe the voices in my head that ask the question, though. Who tell me I am utterly insignificant and unimportant in the world, and not communicating to anyone, or writing, or doing anything besides lying on the couch watching Netflix is a great idea.

I'm almost 27 and I still doubt half the time if my own siblings and parents really like me.

That's where I'm at and I hate it.

I'd love to make that a goal in 2017. To silence those voices.

I just don't know how to do that.

2017 Goals

Personally, my 2016 was pretty amazing.

I got to meet 2 of my favourite authors (Jodi Picoult and Rainbow Rowell); saw plenty of concerts and musicals; got to meet 2 of my favourite musical artists of all time (Carrie Underwood and Delta Goodrem, who made the year pretty amazing on her own tbh); my sister got married, so I got the big brother I've always wanted; and I got a permanent teaching job, which means job security and is everything that is amazing.

So, other than losing some of my favourite actors in the celebrity massacre that was 2016, I don't have a lot to complain about from last year.

Even my mental health is the most stable its been in a few years. I still struggle with depression, but I haven't had any major anxiety attacks in a year and I was really proud of how I handled the stressful times last year that in 2015, would have sent me into a spiralling meltdown.

But if my 2016 had a flaw, it was the lack of writing time I did.

I feel there was a massive decrease from how much I wrote last year as I've done previously. I'm not really sure why.

Some of it was absolutely due to work. I had more responsibility this year, plus I was putting extra work in for my application to get the permanency, which meant there were many times I was just too exhausted to even think about typing.

There were also a few minor health issues I feel may have contributed too- nothing serious, but I have been dealing with some crazy headaches in the past year, which also doesn't help with motivation to write.

The fact that my current WIP After Forever isn't an easy one to write either.... yeah, ok. That's a factor.

I write because I have all these stories in my head. And it keeps me calm and stimulated to work on something for fun. Writing is, and always has been, strictly a passion project for me.

And the passion wasn't lacking in 2016. I have so many stories in my 'to write' list. Many of them were planned and developed last year. I spent so much of the year wanting to write, wanting to work on the new chapter of whatever I was working on, but just lacking the physical and mental energy to do so.

I hate that. Because not writing makes me uncomfortable. I don't feel good- mentally or emotionally- when I don't write.

I'm about to post a oneshot on ff.net What's in a Name? that is my 95th fanfiction on the site. I don't really do New Year's resolutions- because I'm horrible at keeping them.

But my 2017 wishlist is to make writing a priority again. To figure out a way to be more motivated and physically inspired to write, without making it feel like a chore or something that is forced.

Because the idea of reaching my 100th published fanfiction in 2017 is something that sounds kinda amazing.

If you have any ideas/suggestions/recommendations on how I can make this a thing, please let me know!