Lost in translation

So, Wicked started in Seoul, South Korea the other night with 2 preview shows.

And, because that's what I do (I need to know people in other countries appreciate our awesome cast as much as we do here in Australia), I went Googling for news and reviews today.

This time was different due to one small thing- they don't really speak English in Korea. So, I had to make do with letting Google translate the page for me.

Now, not everything translates into English smoothly. Sometimes it's confusing as you try and work out what they mean, and sometimes it's just funny.

Case in point:  One of the articles I found had this headline- "David Harris ' smile ' and petting"

David Harris is Fiyero, of course. The smile, I get. The "petting" on the other hand... it gets better. The first paragraph of the article reads:

actor David Harris 30, Seoul, Hannam blue square took place in Samsung Hall (WICKED) on the musical ', ' media call posing naked.

I'm just casually reading and then was like "wait, what?"

I need to make friends in Korea. Or at least people who speak Korean. This is the article, BTW, in case anyone wants to read it:

http://www.microsofttranslator.com/BV.aspx?ref=IE8Activity&a=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tvreport.co.kr%2Fcindex.php%3Fc%3Dnews%26m%3Dnewsview%26idx%3D231304

But I did read that the cast were given standing ovations. So, I'm assuming they like the show- and really, how can you not?

Apparition

One of the random parts of my Singapore trip was when I turned to Kelly and asked if she agreed that apparition (magical form of transport for those people who haven't read Harry Potter- although I don't know why that would be) would be uncomfortable for pregnant women.

Let me explain- we didn't sleep a lot on this trip. And when I'm tired, my mind wanders and I ask random questions. I've actually wondered that question before, but it was never spoken before.

Here's why I thought this:

In Half Blood Prince, when Harry apparates for the first time, he describes it as

"He was pressed very hard from all directions; he could not breathe, there were iron bands tightening around his chest; his eyeballs were being forced back into his head; his ear drums were being pushed deeper into his skull."

All in all, it's not a very comfortable experience. It's constantly described feeling as though "being forced through a tight rubber tube."

Now, I have never been pregnant. But I read, watch TV and movies and I know people who have been pregnant.
And I know that, especially towards the end, having a small person inside of you is also somewhat uncomfortable.

So, to combine the two experiences sounds again, uncomfortable. If I was a witch and pregnant, I'd be finding alternate modes of transportation.

But is that just me, or does it make sense?

What if...

Am I the only one who sometimes wishes they could re-live their lives, but with the knowledge they have now?

I often imagine how different my life, my relationships and myself would be different if I'd known which people to avoid and who to be friends with; I might have tried harder and done better- and stressed less, in school; I could have found the things I love that speak so clearly and that have changed and shaped me so much (i.e. Harry Potter and Wicked) earlier than I did.

I wonder if I could be a better person.

But then I wonder how my life would be different if that did happen. Would I still have the wonderful friends I have today and be able to appreciate them because I know what it's like to have been through bad friendships?
Would Wicked still speak so clearly to me if I hadn't spent such a large portion of my school life being a victim of bullying? A friendless, social outcast like the green girl I so admire and take strength from?

I'd like to think so, but one of the reasons I fell in love with the show is because I strongly relate to Elphaba.

And for a lot of my closest friends, it is our similar love for Wicked or Harry Potter or Delta Goodrem (or sometimes all three); and/or our similar experiences of being bullied or having low self-esteem that has bonded us and made us such great friends.  I'm not sure if you can truly appreciate good and real friendships until you've experienced the bad.

Besides, any movie I've seen with this kind of plot line, it never works out the way the character plans. He or she usually ends right back where they started, just more appreciative of how their life did turn out.

So, as much as I would have liked to have been a Potter fan from 1997, or been aware and a fan of Wicked from 2003; I have to accept that everything happens for a reason.
I've always believed that, and although sometimes I feel like I've missed out on a lot, and there are definitely things I would do differently, I am who I am and I can't change that.

But sometimes I still like to imagine what it would be like...

Works in progress

I miss writing!!

I haven't really had the time or motivation to write much in the past month. The beginning of term is always busy with writing programs and such. Then it's term 2, which means time for reports, half-yearlies, etc.

But I have been getting a lot of ideas (seeing Wicked always gives me heaps of ideas), and adding them to my "work in progress" folder.

And because people always ask me what I'm writing next, I thought I'd debrief you all:

• 40 Weeks: This is a sequel to Three Leaps Ahead.  I don't really want to give it away, but it's pretty self-explanatory. Basically, it's something light and fluffy. It follows Elphaba and Fiyero week-by-week of a pregnancy. 
• Understanding: This is an Anne of Green Gables one-shot (my first), based off that moment in Anne of Green Gables: the Sequel when Diana talks to Gilbert after Anne refuses his proposal before she leaves for Kingsport. We don't actually see the talk, but Diana tells Anne that "[she] thinks he understands better now." And I wondered what exactly she said. (The title is tentative, but it sounded better than "Anne of Green Gables fic" which is what its listed as in my folder.)
• But for a Moment: The title could change, but this is an alternate ending to May I not lose you. There was a way I almost took the story, but didn't. I mentioned it to Kelly whilst in Singapore, and she insisted I write it. 
• Flying Without Wings: A one-shot based off the Westlife song by the same name. 
• If I let you go: Another one-shot, another Westlife song! (I kinda like Westlife). 
• The Ghost of Kiamo Ko: Based of Daphne Du Maurier's book Rebecca. Summary: "While working as a companion to the Governess Nessarose Thropp, Elphaba meets the widowed and mysterious Fiyero Tiggular. After a whirlwind marriage, she returns to his grand house, Kiamo Ko. Only to find secrets about Fiyero and his first wife, the beautiful Samira still haunt the grounds." (That might change. It feels like a long summary). 
• The Right Thing: A heavy, angst-driven story, which I can't wait to see people's reactions to! No summary as of yet. Very excited about this one!
• The Vow: A co-writing story with my lovely friend Shauna, which is currently on hiatus because of unforseen circumstances. (I miss you Shauna!)
• Sitting on top of the world: A sequel to my NCIS fic In this Life. Summary: With a happy marriage, beautiful son and loving extended family, Tony DiNozzo feels like he's on top of the world. What's next for the NCIS family? 
• Stranger to Myself: This is what I'm working on (very, very slowly) at the moment. I don't think I still have the ending planned, but it's coming slowly. Summary: When the wife of the Governor of Munchkinland gives birth to a green-skinned child, they abandon her at an orphanage in the Emerald City to hide their shame. 20 years later, what happens when she goes looking for answers?
• The Story of Us: A sequel to You've Got Mail.

I think that's all for now!

My Birthday! A Recap

So, today was an awesome day. It was my birthday!

I woke up before my alarm (which is set for 6.30), so I lay there for a while just basking in the joy that it was my birthday (as you do- I know you do). I could already tell it would be a good day, because I was awake pretty much immediately and I made sure I fell asleep the night before listening to Jemma Rix's "Defying Gravity", so I was definitely going to wake up in a good mood!

Then I thought, because my parents are here for the day and I wasn't sure if my alarm would wake them up (and I am a kind and considerate daughter :P), that I should take my phone off the charger and put it next to me so I can turn my alarm off as soon as it goes off.

You can imagine my surprise when I picked up my phone and saw I had a message! It was a birthday present from Bianca, which made me smile. Then I did my morning routine of checking twitter (where I found first birthday tweet from Kelly), Facebook and emails (I was checking for reviews, not birthday messages. I think there was one or two).

Then my alarm went off (my alarm is Delta Goodrem's You will only break my heart) and I got up only 20 minutes after that (that's pretty good- lately it's been sometimes up to an hour). Mum was up, so got first birthday hug and when I got out of the shower, Dad was up and made me pancakes for breakfast. My grandmother called, so I got to talk to her and I got a few more messages and found a few more tweets- like my sunrise photo from Miccy!

They gave me presents as I got ready for school (a lamp for my lounge room, and two DVDs- Princess Diaries 2 and season 5 of Gilmore Girls, FYI- from my grandmother, who had given her present to my mum beforehand).

My walk to school of a morning isn't long, I usually get to listen to maybe a song and a half between my house and school, so it's a decision I have to make carefully each morning- which song will start my day? Today, with my mood, it was an easy choice- Delta's Sitting on top of the world!

I had an 8.30 am playground duty, which isn't too bad, I actually kind of prefer it, because then I'm done for the day. Several kids wished me Happy Birthday as they arrived, which was very sweet of them. I didn't really expect them to remember, especially the primary kids, who I don't see much.

My parents came to the school today, my Dad had arranged to come visit some classrooms and demonstrate the trumpet and cornet. I'm a very proud daughter and my Dad's a really good musician, so I was thrilled. The kids all loved it, and kept telling me all day I have the coolest dad (I agree. Well, maybe not the coolest but definitely one of the best!)

I kept getting more and more excited throughout the day, feeling increasingly loved as I got Facebook messages from family and friends; messages and phone calls from family and friends; twitter messages from friends... and Wicked cast members! I kept telling the teachers at school, and they were amazed.

Regular readers will know I've often commented on my siblings lack of communication with me now that I've moved out of home. Well, today my little brother rang me; my youngest sister said "happy birthday and can I borrow these DVDs from you?" via speaker phone when my grandparents rang after school (insert eye roll here), and my other sister lovingly posted this photo with a "Happy  birthday" message on my Facebook wall:

(This is actually a symbol of love from my sister). The teachers gave me cake at recess and a lunch (I'm special) and I got a present (a journal) from one of the office ladies (and flowers), and a book from my Head Teacher.

And then after school, mum and dad took me shopping for the other half of my bday present, and I got seasons 5-7 of Scrubs. Then we had dinner at the pub, I came home, watched Delta Goodrem's State of Origin performance and caught up on Twitter, Facebook and email conversations (more reviews- yay!) and now here I am writing this!

And now I'm going to bed. I did get a bit teary whilst out tonight knowing mum and dad are leaving tomorrow, but overall, I'm counting this as one of my top birthdays- maybe even the top!

Here's hoping the rest of the year is going to be half as good!

My 21st year in review

Today is my last day as a 21 year old.

And as excited as I am for my birthday tomorrow (because who doesn't like birthdays?) and am excited to see what the 22nd year of my life will bring, I thought it only made sense to reflect upon my year of 21.

21 has always had that big symbolic meaning to it. I know in some places, like the US, being 21 means you can legally drink. In Australia, it really means nothing, but it's still a big deal.

But as I planned my 21st birthday party, I never expected everything that would happen during the year. So, here, in a convenient dot-point format, is a list of the big things (good and bad) that happened to me as a 21-year old.

• My party was awesome. It was a month after my actual birthday, because I wanted to be able to enjoy my party and hence waited until I was on holidays from uni to have it. But I had the majority of my family and friends and people who were important in my life in the one room, which was amazing. I felt so loved and so blessed to have these wonderful people in my life, and I still feel that way. The theme was England (because that's my favourite country- after Australia, of course- even if I haven't been there yet), and I got to go as Elizabeth Bennett. My dress, made by my best friend, Kristel, was fantastic (and green) and it was an amazing night. Having my grandparents there was really special too. My grandad was very sick and probably shouldn't have been travelling, but he insisted on making the 4 hour trip for my birthday, which means the world to me now and I will always have that memory as the strongest proof of how much he loved me.
• I made some of my best friends. I never had real friends until I started going to church when I was 15 and they soon became like family. I had my first true best friend when I met Kristel my first year of uni; but I've never really had a large group of close friends. Until now. Of course, there was the wonderful group of friends I made at uni last year- although for some reason we didn't all come together until second semester... but Erin, Lisa, Lauren, Sarah and Matt are all awesome and I am so grateful for them all and I miss them now! Then there was my twitter friends. First I met Julia and Lauren via fanfiction and twitter, and it took us a while to get used to the time difference between here and the US. It was pretty much exactly a year ago that we started our constant twitter conversations and it was June when Julia created the first chat room (I remember, because I was on prac at that time and it was not long before my birthday party). Then in August I met Kelly and Alana in Perth. At the time, it was just making polite conversation at the Wicked Stage Door, because it's an awkward silence otherwise. And then Kelly found me on Facebook and twitter and the rest is history! I never imagined that Kelly and I would end up going to Singapore together, but I'm so thrillified it's worked out this way! Then not long after, I met the rest of my Twitter girls, who are all beautiful and supportive friends and I love you all- Liana, Bianca, Shauna, Michaela and all the others who have joined our little group over the months, I love you all and I'm so thankful for your friendship.
• Graduating Uni. I decided when I was seven I wanted to be a teacher, and I finally achieved my goal. Knowing I've done it and stuck to it and made something of myself feels really good, even if at times I doubt myself. Teaching is so much more than I dreamed, both in good ways and bad; but best of all, it's great knowing I'm done with assignments and studying!
• Getting a teaching job and moving out of home. This has only been the second hardest thing about being 21. I'm loving having my own space, but being so completely on my own is taking some getting used to. I never imagined I'd miss my family or home so much! But I'm trying to make the most of this year hear and my students are all wonderful kids who I'll always be fond of because they're my first students (all six of them, haha).
• My grandfather died. This was the hardest thing, and it's still hard now. He was very sick for a long time, but actually losing him was something I don't think you can ever be prepared for. I miss him a lot, especially with tomorrow. It was like a punch in my gut yesterday when I got a birthday card from my grandmother in the mail and it was just from Grandma, not the "love Grandma and Grandad" I've gotten every other year. I still go to say "Grandma and Grandad" before I remember that now it's just Grandma. It makes me so much more thankful that I got to share my 21st birthday party with him.
• My first overseas trip. As stressful as airports are, I love flying. And I never imagined I'd ever go to Singapore- the things I do for Wicked! But for my first overseas trip, it was perfect. I loved Singapore, and spending the trip with Kelly and Wicked was awesome. It was so much more than I imagined the trip to be, and I'm so glad I went! Looking forward to more now (New Zealand in 2013, guys. Start saving)!
• Seeing Wicked another 4 times and meeting the cast. Perth in August and 3 times in Singapore. I love this show so much and Perth was so special getting to see it with my parents, meet Kelly and Alana and meet Jemma, David and Lucy. But seeing it in Singapore, with someone who is just as obsessed as I am, front row (for two shows) and 3 times and meeting the cast, getting photos, signatures, hugs and learning that they are all pretty much the nicest people in the world... I have no words.

(I may add to this over time if I remember things I should have written).

I'm so excited to see what being 22 will bring!

11.15

So, last night, at 11.15pm at night, I had a major breakdown. This completely came out of nowhere. One minute I was lying there, perfectly content to go to sleep and the next I'm in tears.

Now, this has never been an unusual occurrence- it usually happens maybe once or twice a month (although not usually in the middle of the night); but in the past month, it's fairly common for me to abruptly burst into tears. At first I attributed it to a mixture of coming off holiday and Wicked high (trust me, that's normal). But now I'm getting a little worried there's more to it.

I'm not even sure I know what started it, I wasn't thinking about anything that was the cause of the tears.

But all of a sudden, I'm crying my eyes out and thinking about... well, everything. It was mostly two main issues.

The first is that I miss people. I miss my family, my friends and home. Which is ridiculous, because my parents will be out here on Tuesday for two days for my birthday. But I talked to my mum last night and it came up that my dad is not a phone person (he's really not). Mum said that dad is a phone person when he wants to be- when he calls you.
Which is the point. He doesn't call me. My mum doesn't call me. My siblings definitely do not call me.
Mum said that she doesn't call because she figures I'll call when I have something to say.

But I rarely get phone calls. Most of my communication these days seems to be through twitter. I have great friends on Facebook, mostly from uni, who I really miss but the closest we come to talking is maybe a status comment or like. And don't get me wrong, that's definitely my fault as much as theirs, but still...I miss people.

Then there's my lack of car and driving ability and I'm still waiting for them to arrange to bring my car out here (and register it). There's people here who have said once my car is out here, they'll take me driving, but I still need to get the car out here. I want to drive, I want to finish my hours, because I think once I'm able to drive, I might feel less completely isolated.

And then there's school. I'm still finishing my programs (I'm down to one though which is good). I have a pile of marking and then there's reports and all that is before lesson prep. On top of that, I have to worry about accreditation stuff, which is confusing and nerve-wracking.

I'm kind of feeling like I'm drowning at the moment.

And there's times when I'm worried that I'm failing. People keep telling me how proud they are of me, and how brave I am for what I'm doing. I don't feel brave, I feel like I'm sucking.

I miss writing. And reading. I don't have the energy or motivation to do that much lately and I miss it. But I just can't get inspired to do so. All I have the energy to do is watch DVDs or TV.